“Grief isn’t meant to be silenced, to live in the body and be carried alone.”
Between Two Kingdoms: A Memoir of Life Interrupted
note: I finished reading Between Two Kingdoms: A Memoir of Life Interrupted by Suleika Jaouad.
Books I am reading: War and Peace, Matrix by Lauren Groff, The Life of Elves by Muriel Barbery and The best American Poetry 2021, Tracy K.Smith, guest editor and David Lehman, series editor.
Time’s passing so quickly
You have not returned from your walk
You should have been getting ready
To go to ride the ferry
Eating breakfast, dressing up
But morning unfurls like a yarn with a cat
The telephone is garbled confusion
Converging into cries and disbelief
Of what has happened.
Tears take time to dry
Smile takes time to sustain
Flowers, sea, flamingoes, stories can not
Take the place of loss, we
Brave each morning, learning
New steps, each night may bring
New dreams, to remember and celebrate
Your life that will not return
Understanding and surrender take time
Love bears and endures all things
The only truth I have to know.
like hundreds galloping horses
tear through the woods
breaking trees, felling power lines
like Archimedes’s eureka moment of sudden insight
trees light up
hiding the stars
blaze dances, laughs, gathering energy
hellish felicity descends
fire pours it’s peaking power
valley asleep or dazed
immobile, innocent, whole neighborhood
stands on the way
leave, hurry, unprepared
Swift in devastation
ashes, interrupted silence
fields of desolation
grief, too heavy
even for God
note: Multiple fires started in Napa and Sonoma shortly after midnight on Sunday. More than 1500 dwellings, 72000 acres burned down. 15 deaths,
and climbing. The fires still zero contained.
Mrs. Abstract and I and our families are safe. Several of our friends lost their homes.
“Real tragedies don’t need to be redeemed, they need to be remembered.”
“There are times when sorrow seems to be the only truth.”
-Shannon Leone Fowler, Traveling With Ghosts
note: The quotations are taken from the book, Traveling With Ghosts:A Memoir of Love and Loss by Shannon Leone Fowler, a book I just finished reading.
Pain from falls is pain
pain of loss is sadness
losing a friend binds all losses
a rope of mourning and grief
tightening stages, a morning fog
that never seems to fade.
Even the angels cry.