If writing verses of a song can help
Memorize prime numbers and build
Memory, all my failings will fade
Away, I will be grateful for the new
Developments like learning how to elope
And reverse expenses. I, myself,
Will be smiling, stand at the center of the stage
Start a play though will not make me richer, will make
Me less poorer. Is it an improvement to end
The year? Or is it a certain type of beauty,
A beauty of a moment that suddenly disappear?
Enduring moment is enduring the present bringing
Enough strength to move the wheels of hope.
It’s awful to feel lonely.
Walk and empty your pockets of loneliness
the day is 69 degrees with cool breeze
red flowers are greeting the sun
meet bichon frise and bernese mountain dogs
or a man carrying a float tube on his back.
note: My Friday walk to the river: 9, 670 steps, 3.7miles
A feast of drinks, laughters, and embraces
And the late hour. I felt
Carried in the softness of air and deep comfort
Deeper into nothingness.
I woke up with darkness breaking
Chairs, tables, chandelliers, photos on the walls appearing
It was not the particulars that were frightening
Or the suddenness that was bewildering
Or the dull argument I was visited by demons
It was the silence, surrounded by silence
The loneliness of waking, waking up alone.
I fold all the tables
I fold all the chairs
I toast a glass of wine, alone
I will not cry.
and torment of commitment
I have to laugh
to soften the thunderous decision.
It’s not easy to be an artist
and search for one’s identity.